Sunday, September 4, 2011

a giant pool for sexual predators

braces by ceck0face
braces, a photo by Digital Heather on Flickr.

This picture was taken December 1, 2009, and is therefore old and old news. My hair hasn't been that long since then and my face looks very chubby despite the fact that I probably weighed 30lbs less in this picture.

I also no longer have those glasses or braces. I bought that key at an antique store when J moved here from NY and the other necklace is made out of dyed corn kernels. My mom bought it for me in the painted desert when I was a kid and the sign claimed it was real corn and crafted into a necklace by a real Native American. I took their word for it.

I bought the sweater shirt in Florida while visiting J's father--nowhere exciting, just Target-- and my friend John calls it my orphan shirt or inside out orphan shirt because it's inside out on purpose but he swears poor orphans made it.

I hurriedly took this pic right before going out with Sarah, my up-and-coming maid of honor, but I don't remember what we did or where we went that night.

There is nothing special about or behind this picture. However, this is my most popular picture on my flickr account. She has an astounding 2,723 views as of this second.

And for no reason other than the fact that the internet is a giant pool for sexual predators, swimming in their own and each other's semen. Having said that, I am repulsed but disappointed that I never followed through becoming a suicide girl. I'm so much chubbier now and in 55 days, a wife. Both very good reasons to put it to bed.

Speaking of. We ordered our wedding rings today. I hate paying money for something tangible but not ready to come home yet. I'll post pictures when they're done being sized.

I spent the rest of my evening watching my sister lose a bet with a slot machine and wondering why every girl in a black tank top always has an ugly back tattoo decorated with even nastier back acne (backne). At least where I live and the surrounding areas. Wash your back or wear a shirt. I'm a mean girl.

But, thankfully, I am not a bridezilla.

Also of interest, I am so territorial that I'm pretty sure I was an animal in my past life.

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